i just wanna soil my oats bro
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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