how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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