So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
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