You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
