can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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