i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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