ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I need water and some morals
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
