Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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