Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
