why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
