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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.

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• (315): View more from New York

  apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.

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• (228): View more from Mississippi

  Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude

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• (619): View more from California

  She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.

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• (323): View more from California

  She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again

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