I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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