Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
