he wants to bone in the snuggie
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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