Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
her vagine was all disorganized.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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