once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize
