"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
we made out on top of his cat.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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