Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
