Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
