youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Randomize
