His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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