If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
