So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
