I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
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