The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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