turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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