can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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