Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
