dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
