she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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