whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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