All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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