You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
