theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
