i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize