yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
be right there i have to get my cape
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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