He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
