did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
