Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
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