i just google imaged poop.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
