he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
