We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Never joke about your clitoris.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
