Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize