woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I checked into jail on foursquare
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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