no, he came in my armpit
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
