Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
