Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
That was before I lit my hair on fire
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize