Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
