Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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