so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
