Kiss
Puke
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
