I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
